Changes

We've had a lot of changes going on around here aside from just Day care!
Remember Thomas' Mommy Designed bedroom?

Well we've made a couple of modifications. No More Crib! Thomas has a new "Big Boy Bed" and he loves it. He loves it even more because Grandma bought him a matching sheet and comforter set to go with his all sports room!!! And he even makes his bed every morning!


Next he got some new throw rugs that Mommy just couldn't resist. And of course they go perfectly in his all sports room.
And why does Thomas get all these new things? Because Grandma told him when he was all done in pull ups and diapers and all that and was wearing his big boy underwear she would get him something special for his room and his big boy bed!

He's all grown up now!! Well okay not fully, he still needs his mommy to tuck him in at night!

Hosted by Cecily and ???

My Little Miracles

Stargazed

As I have posted before, I am not Star Struck. I was born and raised in So. Cal and they were a very common sighting. Especially when you had a family member who worked for Time Inc (you know, People Mag, Time, Sports Ill) Yeah, so I met a few and they weren't all that different. I also went to school with a lot of the star's kids...John Davidson's kids....Hey he was a big thing back then...That's Incredible...remember? Okay so it ages me but whatever! =) Heather Graham, yep remember when she got her start in Licensed to Drive, and countless others, they were and are a dime a dozen!

Well after getting my degree in Psych with a minor in Drug and Alcohol rehab, I worked in a drug and alcohol rehab. And it's no secret that many stars go through drug and alcohol rehab. And in places where we would meet, I would meet several "stars" and was never star struck, they were just another person to which I spoke with.

Now this one time stands out in my mind, not because of the person per say, but the location in which we were hanging out and the reaction of one girl. So there was the local coffee house, it was called Lose the Blues, and it was the happening spot, it was the Starbucks of the time. And a lot of us hung out there. There were some great memories made there...it's really too bad it went out of business.

Anyway, I digress, so sitting outside, smoking, (I Know, I was a rebel) talking with this person, about life, his children, 6 at the time, Catholicism, and the most recent donations of clothes Lose the Blues had gotten for the poor. No biggie, it was a lot of fun, but like I said, just another person who was there and someone to talk to. I never thought a lot about it.

But this one girl, and when I say Girl, I mean young....14 or 15? And she about lost her teenage mind....she walked up to said celebrity and said OMG OMG OMG, Umm HI, is that really you? OMG OMG Hi! It can't be you, is that really you? OMG OMG can I like shake your hand? And she literally held her own arm out to this person, and he laughed hysterically and shook his own arm and never did shake hers. And all she kept saying was OMG OMG OMG Is that really you? I think he finally got annoyed and said "Nope it's not really me."

That made me laugh more than anything else! I was shocked that he was so calm, cool and funny about the situation, of course he was, he ran into it every. single. day. Guess I never thought to act like a fool around him. I rather see him and a human being, someone just like you and me, and I had a conversation with him. And I think he appreciated it, And every time I saw him after that, was just like "Hey, how's it going".

That person who was so down to Earth and relaxed in the face of all his celebrity status...

Mel Gibson

My celebrity moment brought to you by Mama Kat

My Little Miracles

Day Care Drama

What a whirlwind of information I have come into.
Many of you have sent me an email asking about the boys and their day care situation.
Well let's see, I have a few things to report.
The boys are now staying with my mom 3 days a week and 2 days with a friend of mine whom the boys just love! I mean who doesn't love the "baby sitter" who let's them go nuts huh? They have a ton of fun together!

I have been contacted by police detectives as well as CA State licensing.

It's scary to think that I may have unknowingly put my children in danger of anything. But I am armed with knowledge when it comes to that stuff now!

When contacted by licensing today she asked the standard questions, did I ever notice the kids being unattended, did I ever witness any physical abuse, any yelling at the children? Any clinginess, loss of appetite or indifference, any over all chance in attitude? How many children did I ever see there at any given time? Was I required to notify her if I was picking up the kids early? Did I ever notice any diaper rash so bad that would signify any sign of neglect? Were we aware that her new assistant was never finger printed and background checked?

Now there are two things that were brought to my attention that never bugged my brain until now, and I feel as if I could just kick myself, and one of them makes me sick to my stomach.
1st, she asked me if I was aware how my baby was fed? Well umm no? I am sure when he was 5 months and I started leaving him that she held him for his bottle but I didn't know and my dumb a$$ never thought to ask. I did notice as he got a little older that she would put him in this little hammock like chair thingie and prop up a bottle for him, and she did the same for another little baby there. Then she asked me if Christopher ever had ear infections….why yes as a matter of fact he did, chronic ones, to the point that his specialist recommended having tubes put in. And she told me, just so you know….that is a HUGE NO NO!!! Propping up a bottle for him to eat can actually CONTRIBUTE to chronic ear infections! NICE!!! That's the part that makes me kick myself!

What makes me sick…is what we think happened to Christopher, a soft little soul with no voice, no way of telling us what happened. Now Thomas was afraid of the vacuum when he was a baby, and we didn't want that for Christopher, so we would vacuum around him, he would be in his swing and we would vacuum and we would even hold him and vacuum and never a peep out of him. He didn't seem bugged by it AT. ALL! Now…..you can't even mention the "V" word around him and he becomes this shaking, quivering, blubbering, screaming mess. And we were informed that there was some "mental abuse" going on, and now it makes me and the hubs believe that when he did show signs of being afraid of the vacuum that they didn't take that into account. And in the long run he was made to suffer.

How can people do things like that to kids, it's not even funny. To see him literally shake with fear, it's scary and makes my heart bleed. I would like to think it didn't happen, but I fear it did.

At least now, he is in quality care with Grandma, until he will start his preschool class in September. And Thomas will be in his preschool class in June. A little private school with great reputation and quality teachers. I will be relieved! We should find out some findings in a couple of weeks, and I will keep you all posted.

My Little Miracles

I didn't break it

Honestly mommy,

I didn't break it...
I am just seeing how it works.....

My poor calculator!

And I still don't think he knows how it works!

Don't you just love boys?

Brought to you by Angie at Seven Clown Circus

and 5 Minutes for mom

My Little Miracles

Mommy Means it, Mean ole Mommy

Parent with Me
Disclaimer: These are Different things I have and am learning about parenting. I'm not always right, as my kids will surely tell you if they had the words. I'm not always perfect, so these are things that work FOR ME....so Parent with me....tell me what works for you. Don't have kids? Doesn't matter, tell me what you think might work.

Be consistent and Follow through!
It's hard to say NO to these amazing brown eyes

And these gorgeous Blue Eyes

But these days in my house, my boys are learning that when Mommy says NO, Mommy Means it and nothing is going to change that! You want to go to the park, we can do that, but only if you are behaving, I will give you once chance, and if you can't make that one chance work to your advantage, then I'm all done giving you chances. And it's unfortunate that sometimes the brother has to suffer because one can't behave. So they are learning.

My boys don't talk back to me, Okay so only one TALKS, my 20 month old's verbage consists of 4 words and lots of grunts and groans and points and pouts and such. But Thomas is learning REAL QUICK, That Mommy isn't a push over and he will not rule this house. He has learned in the past that talking to mommy badly earns him a real fast train trip that stops no where but his room. He HATES being in his room with no toys to play with and no one to play them with.

The hubs and I are being consistent and following through. Lately Thomas decides he doesn't want to eat a full dinner, he banks on the fact that we won't let him starve, so he'll pick at his dinner and then around 7:30 or 8 he will try to get something he would much rather have, like cereal. NOPE! Mommy made dinner, and grant it, I do NOT make things the kid won't eat. He doesn't eat pasta, he barfed on it once so he's all done with pasta, so it's not like I make him a huge plate of pasta and force him to eat it or starve! But I can see that he is trying to manipulate the situation to his advantage. Nope, not anymore. This isn't Mommy's first trip to the circus, I know what's up, and Dinner is dinner, and if you don't eat it, I guess you'll learn to eat more the next night right?

Christopher, just the other night, sitting at dinner wanted some juice...I told him he wasn't going to fill up on juice he needed to eat his dinner first and he cried...he had big ole ploppin' crocodile tears pouring out of his sweet blue eyes....awww my poor baby! Ok let me think for a minute.....umm Nope, you still aren't getting juice. I know MEAN MOMMY huh? But guess what....he ate his dinner, and he got juice! Win - Win I'd say right?

It's working, Thomas doesn't tell me NO and talk back to me anymore. He calmly and collectively will tell me he doesn't want to. Or when it's time for nap he will say "I stay and watch TV, just for a little bit." He knows that after dinner is over there is no more to eat or drink. But he will say "I would like some milk, just a little bit". He asks me calmly and collectively and I tell him calmly and collectively that it's not going to happen! He cries, but it doesn't last long, and it breaks my heart to see my baby's crying knowing that I can "fix it" if I just give in. But I also know if I give in, it's all over!

But being consistent and following through, what we say goes and no amount of crying, pleading, begging or anything is going to change that!
What kinds of things are you consistent on?

I am linking up with Dumb Mom again, need a Mom tip...want to share a Mom tip Head on over to see Dumb Mom, she makes parenting fun!

My Little Miracles

All Aboard

Sundays in My City brought Thomas the Train

And tatoos
Hay mazes, bounce houses, lots of food, family and friends

Happy Brothers sharing it together

They sure did have a great time running around!

What's happening in your city?

Brought to you by Unknown Mami

My Little Miracles

Birth from the Inside Out

I was just recently talking to a friend of mine who is 7 months, and of course when you start talking about pregnancy and birth we all have our birth story and we all have a horror story or suggestions about birth.

I remember having a really difficult decision to make when it came time for Thomas' birth. Now mind you, Thomas was born at 9 lbs 9 oz. We knew he was going to be big. I needed to make the decision, be induced, take the chance of going through labor for 12+ hours and possibly need a csection anyway, go through labor and take the chance of needing to break his collar bone or my pelvis to get him out safely or just opt for the csection.

Well it worked out that I didn't get the choice, he was far too big and the specialist whose care I was under said NOPE...too big and she's little, csection for sure! So of course I did it the easy way. haha Christopher at 6+ weeks early was still 7lbs 13 oz and I did go through several hours of labor with him before we went to the hospital and my doc sectioned him as well. And not once did I think about Birth from the inside out.

When in college I took a child psych class, my professor wrote this wonderful poem and it made me think of all my friends who are pregnant now....so behold,

Birth from the Inside out
I've been growing a thousand fold, and more, gently floating, rocking inside this dark water cave. Feeding, breathing, through you, my mother, my life support. The steady beat of your heart lulls me to sleep and keep me secure all day....I am safe.

But I've grown so much. Your space for me gets smaller every day. I've been cramped and squeezed, laying upside down in here for too long. It's so uncomfortable, I can barely move! I just can't stand it anymore. Oh, God, I'll do anything you ask, just get me out of here!

You and I decide together that it's time. Contractions begin. Slam, Squeeze, I didn't realize what I was getting into. There it goes again, forcing my head down into you. The pressure comes and goes in perfect rhythm, growing stronger each time, like some giant power pushing me through you. I lose my water home, what's coming? What IS this?

Oh - my little squashed head oozes free. Whoosh - my shoulders. Whoosh - my body.

Space - open - free...I scream, this is all so new. Cold air rushes into me, expanding me, I choke a little. Where are you, my mother, my life support? Where is my safe dark water home? Who are these masked strangers?

Hold me, mother, touch me gently, talk to me quietly, until I get used to these new sensations. Let me suckle at your breast, and feel you warm, close, secure again. Humm to me the lullaby you always used to sing when I was growing inside you.

My eyes open timidly - let me look into your eyes, and imprint your loving face upon my mind. What is this place I'm in? Help me explore the newness, mother....slowly, gently.

We are one in birth, we are bonded in love.

~L. Meschan

And it is that bond, that makes it all worthwhile!
So Kara, my lovely? Don't stress, YOU will do awesome, and you will be an excellent mom!

My Little Miracles

One Good Recipe

Mom holding Erin, Dad holding TJ

Take a lot of fights,
A pinch of "God Mom, that is so last year"
A dash of "NO WAY ARE YOU WEARING THAT"
A few "That is so incredibly dumb mom, I can't even handle it"
Add several "Do I need to pack a bag....you know, in case this guilt trip is going to be an over nighter"
More than one "I'm never speaking to you again"
1 really bad broken marriage of mine....
1500 miles in between
Daily phone calls....sometimes more than once a day...
a move home....and 2 grandsons later
A whole lot of love
Shaken....not stirred. And that is the awesome recipe that creates the unstoppable bond I have with my mom.

No matter what has ever gone on in my life, even if my mom didn't like it, or agree with it, she has always been my biggest fan. We haven't always seen eye to eye, and we haven't always agreed....but she's one of my best friends.

My maternal grandmother was 93 when she passed away and I only pray that my mom lives to be that old. I hope that for myself, because I don't know what I would do without her, and I hope that for my boys....so that they may know her in all aspects of their life, and they will see the cheerleader that she has always been for me!

I hope that I can be my boys biggest fan, their greatest cheerleader, their biggest supporter. I want to be the ones my boys come to when they need something.....anything. I want them to feel comfortable with me and I want them to know that no matter what, I love them with a fierceness they will never know. Think of the strongest love you know, multiple that by infinity and take that into the depths of forever and that is how much I love my boys! I will always love them unconditionally.

People ask me all the time "Aren't you bummed you didn't have a girl?" NOPE! I never wanted one, and I am glad I didn't get one....because I watched me grow up, you think I want that???? HECK NO!! I know my mom is disappointed I didn't have a girl, not because she wanted a granddaughter, but because she wants me to know the relationship with my daughter that I have with her. I plan on having the same relationship...the same bond that I have with my mom.....with my boys! And all it takes....love, and patience, and understanding. All the things my mom has given to me!

And there is a special bond between a mother and a son! One I hope I will always have with my boys!

Brought to you by Mama Kat

My Little Miracles

Going Crazy...I'm driving!

Because nothing says fun like driving in the grocery store car!

1st time both boys sat together...and let me tell you they barely fit!

Brought to you by Angie at the 7 clown circus and 5 Minutes for mom

My Little Miracles

I will not give in

Parent with Me
Disclaimer: These are Different things I have and am learning about parenting. I'm not always right, as my kids will surely tell you if they had the words. I'm not always perfect, so these are things that work FOR ME....so Parent with me....tell me what works for you. Don't have kids? Doesn't matter, tell me what you think might work.

I learn a lot about parenting from watching others. Things I see that work and made me think "Hey that was really good, and it worked, maybe I'll try that". I share what my kids do a lot and I learn from feed back from others. And I also learn a lot from seeing how I do NOT want my children to act!

But the one person I learn a lot from....the Hubs! Yep that's right! I watch him interact with our boys, I watch how he handles certain situations. Our views on parenting are so similar, and one thing we do not put up with is being disrespectful to us or others. We don't put up with tantrums, and we don't give in to them either.

But the one thing I have noticed we do is withdrawal from conflict with the boys. We will not play the game with them. So what the hubs does with Thomas, and I have learned to follow suit...When they are trying to test us with temper tantrums or anger spells we put them in another room and tell them that when they are ready to try again to call us and we'll start over.

We do not become angry or give in and hang our head in defeat. But in a loving way we are showing our boys that they need to stop and try again. Some times it takes time and time and time again. We ask Thomas several times sometimes if he is ready to try again...and good thing kids are brutally honest, because he'll tell us no sometimes. And we once again withdrawal from the conflict until he's ready to try again.

It sure is an easier alternative that screaming back at our children, and confusing them with our anger. They don't understand their own anger how can we possibly expect them to understand ours? A side step sure goes a long way instead of butting heads in anger until one side "wins" for lack of a better word.

My Little Miracles

In Kim's City

I spent my Sunday in a City that isn't mine anymore!

I had my Mommy weekend and went back to visit my besties in Michigan! I haven't been back in almost 4 years! It hasn't changed much.

When I left, the Dow Diamond was just being built. This is the minor league team for the LA Dodgers, they are called the Great Lake Loons.

And what would anything Dodgers be without mention of Lasorda?

Now let me say, when my flight touched down at 12:30am Friday morning, the temp was 73 degrees. By noon on Friday the temp was 70 degrees. By game time it was 43 degrees AND by nights end, we did see some flurries of snow!! Look at how angry those clouds were!

And it was WINDY!! Lou E. Loon stopped for a pic!

And it was so great to see all my friends, Kim, Kat, Robert, and Kara! I Heart you guys!!!

I also spent some time with friends and fund raising...yes you read that right....one night only, Monty Python to benefit the local boys and girls club!

And when that didn't really knock our socks off it was off to all the local watering holes! What an awesome time....Renee, Kim, Cami and Suz....my lovlies, you girlies rocked my world, I heart you...Thanks for an awesome time!! I can't wait until you girls come out here!!

And what would a trip to Michigan be without a little glow bowling?

It will probably be another 4 years before I make it back out there again! But now it's their turn to come out here!

So even though I wasn't in MY city this Sunday, I shared a little piece of what used to be my city and now I'll just call it Kim's city! Kim you are my Hero, I miss you bunches! And it was so good to see you again....oh yeah and that 20 bucks.....it's coming back your way some way or another!

Brought to you by Unknown Mami

My Little Miracles

Rockford Finds his Fire

Iggy's bed was acting funny, so he peeked under it and to his surprise he saw a dragon hiding. He called to him, but he didn't know his name. He finally crawled under his bed and got close enough to meet this dragon, his name was Rockford.

Rockford says he was hiding because his friends were making fun of him because he couldn't breathe fire like all of them. He lost his fire. Iggy wanted to help him find it. But in order to find it, they needed to come out from under the bed.

They went to all the places Rockford had been and still couldn't find it. He said it was no use, he would forever be made fun of because he had no fire. Iggy thought and thought, there MUST be a way to find it.

He took Rockford and his bed to Corcoran, a magical place where he could talk to Pothos, he would know where to look. After talking to Pothos they discovered the last place he remembered having his fire was when it came in little streams and his friends made fun of him. So Pothos send them back to that place.

When they got there they had to dodge all of the name calling coming their way. Pothos asked him to try to make his fire. He refused. Iggy told him he could do it, just ignore what they were saying. He could do it! Rockford was still not so sure.

He tried and tried and was about to give up. With Iggy as his biggest fan, Rockford tried one more time, and he did it, it was stronger than it had ever been. Pothos told him he never really lost it, he just needed the confidence to bring it out!

Okay give me a break, I could have made it so much better but they only gave me 1500 words AND I have the worst head cold you could imagine. But I did try right?

Now if you want to try your hand at coming up with a creative story that could earn you 2500 bucks....head on over to Mama Kat's to find out how!

My Little Miracles

My new little buddy

Check it....

My new little buddy!

My New Netbook

Isn't it CA-UTE??? I just adore it, now I can take it with me where ever I go....compared to the huge and bulky laptop behind it!
Now I can check up on all my favs no matter where I'm at!
And just in time for my trip to Michigan!
Tell me that isn't something to talk about!

Brought to you by the absent Angie!

Happy Wordful Wednesday!

My Little Miracles

Each Betrayal begins with Trust

I wasn't going to write about this, and considering this is my Parent with Me day, my tip this week is about being a parent.

Sign me up for Mother of the year award! I am having some serious Mommy Guilt!

When it came time for me to go back to work after I had Thomas I was devastated, I was terrified to leave him at a day care center. My mind told me that he would be left alone in a corner in a crib to cry! So I got a nanny....a highly over paid nanny I might add. I picked her up and took her home every day but at least I was comfy with the idea that she came to my house and Thomas got individual care.

When Christopher was born we switched Thomas to a Kindercare 2 times a week for a few hours just so he could get accustomed to being around other kids and a structure and such. And it devastated me to leave him because he cried and cried, but he eventually got used to it. Then he was home with me for 5 months along with Christopher. And when it came time for me to go back to work again, I researched and researched several places, went for interviews and everything....settled on an in home day care down the road. It was small, it was cozy, and the woman was so great with the kids! Thomas was a little unsure at first but then settled in nicely! Christopher had his moments, and went about 3 months when he would just cry and cry and cry when we would drop him off. It eventually ended.

The boys had been there for a year this last January. I have been so happy with this situation, I have even blogged about how wonderful she is and how fortunate I am to have such great day care.

Now....not so much.

Betrayal is a hard thing to swallow. Anger is an even harder thing to get through when it's due to betrayal. I have learned a few things about my oh so great day care provider. I don't know if they are true. At this point I don't care. The doubt is there and I am SO ANGRY!!!!

She was MY FRIEND! How could she? How dare she? The more I think about it, the angrier I get, at myself, at her.....seeing her name come up on my caller ID, listening to her voice on my voice mail, telling me that everything is falling apart and her recent assistant is ruining her, and how SHE feels betrayed! HER! What about me? What about all the other mom's and dad's? What about THE CHILDREN!!!!!!

I won't go into too many details, and thank God my children are safe and unharmed. But how did I not see any of this? Why didn't I question more? Needless to say my children are no longer at this day care, and will not be going back.

So this weeks Parent with me.....

Need a day care? Research it! Make sure that each aspect of that day care follows the licensing agreements for the state in which you live. Don't know what those licensing rules are....FIND OUT! Make sure that day care isn't considering their kids as meal tickets and only wants more because they are greedy and doesn't care about the safety and welfare of the children.

NEVER is it okay for any day care provider to slap, spank, or hit your child....EVER! They come home with a bruise....QUESTION IT! I get it, that kids will be kids, and kids fall...unexplained marks...ASK ABOUT IT!

Communicate with your children, make sure that they know it's not okay for a teacher or day care provider to degrade them in any way. TALK TO THEM! Make sure you ask about their day, if they are 2 and have a limited vocabulary, still ask, there are things they will tell you that would alert you to any mistreatment.

Make sure that the daycare provider you meet with who says they are taking care of your children are actually there. At the end of the day when you are getting a report of your child's day, make sure that person was there!

ALWAYS stop in at random times, plan to pick your child up early without warning.

Know the parents of the other children in day care, befriend them, talk to them often. Ask how they think care is going.

And lastly, KNOW YOUR RIGHTS, when and if the mistreatment of any child is involved!

Linking up again this week with Dumb Mom, need a tip? Have a tip? Link it up at Dumb Moms place!

My Little Miracles

My baby is now a boy

Sunday in my City, My baby became a boy...at least he looks like one now!

I have been putting this off for a while now....my little baby boy was starting to look like a girl.
Daddy said it was time....

So my baby got all his beautiful curls cut off today....

Our friend Stephanie, who cut Thomas' hair the 1st time, did Christopher's as well. He sat like such a big boy, but he did not want the cape on.

So although he kept wanting to see what she had going on behind him, we did get it cut with no tears, (except from mommy!) and he even let her use the clippers to even out the back!

He was NOT a fan of all the hair all over him, he kind of has a clean fetish, so he kepts brushing off all the long hair! And afterwards he kept touching his hair and the back of his neck. I can't tell if he was upset it was gone or happy! As long as it's not in his eyes anymore that is all I cared about!

Brought to you by Unknown Mami

My Little Miracles