Lessons Learned

1. Just because you incessantly comment on some one's blog, does NOT mean they will comment or even visit your blog. I think it just means you are a stalker!

2. I need to always write for me and not for what I think will please others

3. It happens, people UNfollow you. *gasp* I know huh?

4. You can't tell a tone based on the written word, so sometimes what you say can be taken wrong in a post as well as in a comment.

5. You can blog about almost anything...and someone, somewhere is reading it. And you can also post about the most innocent thing in the world and you will find it under some of the strangest searches.

6. It's hard to remember who does and does not read your blog when it comes to family and friends, so be careful what you say!

7. I'm not star struck by any stars, I grew up in So. Cal and among stars and their children, I worked with many of them while I was a counselor in a drug and alcohol rehab...no big deal to me. But no matter what....if I get a "big name blogger" to comment on my postings, I get stupid excited! Would that be called Blog Struck?

8. I Never blog while the boys are awake....I might miss the perfect photo or some sort of hilarity that spews from the mouths of babes that would be so blog worthy.

9. When I think of a post...I need toWRITE IT DOWN...otherwise I forget my exact wording that was really excellent or funny and when I revisit it later, it doesn't seem so wonderful, which is probably why I have so many drafts!

10. And when all else fails...if you can't dazzle them with brilliance baffle them with B.S.

These are just a few of the things I've learned in my almost 3 years of blogging and it was brought to you by Mama Kat

My Little Miracles

I LOVE IT!

I'm so excited I can't hardly sit still or hold a thought in my head! June 30th baby! I am so there! Myself and A bunch of my besties are going to see the midnight showing, I have a friend already prepared to get our tickets as soon as she can.

I know, I'm lame...but it took me 3 weeks to read all 3 books....and Midnight sun....now it's going to take me YEARS to see all the movies and to read her new book from Bree's perspective! I. Just. Love. It!!

My Little Miracles

Bittersweet

For this weeks wordful Wednesday, I don't think I have enough words that can say to one of my Besties, Brooke, how much I am going to miss her....Her hubby's company is taking him back to her home town up Nor Cal, AND she is pregnant!!


Wait let me see if I can come up with the words....YOU SUCK, for leaving....


But I am so happy that life is really starting to work out for you and the family, you deserve it so much!

And I will miss your daily antics, the hilarity of your family stories, your 100 calorie packs....oh yeah and the 4 El Pollo Loco tacos and your explanations of how they really are good for you!

But I am so bummed I will miss the growing of your belly and seeing you like this again!!!! So you best be postin' pics WEEKLY of your growing belly. And be thinking about what kind of blankie you are going to want.
You will be missed, I'm going to be in SF in August, so we better be hookin' up! Take care of that little growing baby....I hope it's a boy this time, MC needs a little brother!! I love ya Mama!!

For more Wordful Wednesdays head over to Angies!

My Little Miracles

Because my children are the sparkle in my eye

Once again it's that time of the week...Parent with Me.
Disclaimer: These are Different things I have and am learning about parenting. I'm not always right, as my kids will surely tell you if they had the words. I'm not always perfect, so these are things that work FOR ME....so Parent with me....tell me what works for you. Don't have kids? Doesn't matter, tell me what you think might work.

I have written before about being a full time mom and a working away from home mom, and as I have felt the Mommy Guilt about having to leave them with a nanny as well as at this awesome-I-couldn't-say-more-positive-awesome-excellent-I-Love-My-In-Home-Day-Care, day care, it didn't take long for that guilt to dissipate, when I discovered it isn't the AMOUNT of time I spend with my children it is the QUALITY of time that I have with them.

Life is busy enough as it is, work, errands to run, things to do, cleaning, laundry, doctor's appts, dental appts, shopping....I mean anybody with or without children can say that LIFE HAPPENS, and it's busy! So because of that I have been attempting to use GEMS with my children. Genuine Encounter Moments, which in layman's terms.... focused attention. It is defined as: attention with a special intensity born of direct personal involvement. Vital contact means being intimately open to the particular, unique qualities of your child.

I have noticed that my boys have been away from me all day long, they miss me, they want to tell me about their day in a way they know best. Sometimes that is "Mommy, look at me" or "Watch me Mommy, I can slide too". Not only are the boys competing against each other for my attention, but also with everything else that happens in life. That phone call, dinner making, shopping, watching TV. It's no wonder our children are constantly looking for our attention. The more you use GEMS the less they will strive to do anything negative....because we all know that negative attention is still attention, and it's better than being ignored!

One of these ways that the hubs and I have committed ourselves to this practice, is not only spending time independently with the boys. If I need to go to the store, why take both boys so they can not only compete for my attention with each other but also with the shopping? I take one, and leave the other at home with dad. Thomas gets to help with the shopping while Christopher gets some quality time with dad.

We make sure to spend our evenings with the boys, dinner....all of us, at the table, talking. If I need to run an errand, I take one boy with me, we have our quality time together. My attention is focused on my child first and foremost. Sure Christopher isn't "talking" more like grunting and pointing and crying. But he has my individual attention. Bath time, that is time for me and the boys to play together and be silly. And bedtime, a story, we talk about the story, we interact, and last but not least, I tell them I Love them.

Dad does the lawn and yard work every weekend, and Thomas is out there too, with Dad, mowing the lawn, picking weeds and planting flowers, that is his quality time with Dad, while Christopher gets to goof around with Mommy.

I have also noticed that confirming the behavior makes a HUGE difference. When Thomas is behaving and acting good, it's common place in our house to remind him what a good boy he is being and that Mommy and Daddy appreciate it when he is a good boy. When Christopher is behaving and doing what he is supposed to be doing, we tell him, you sure are being good, and to remind them always that they get attention even when they are being good. You don't have to be doing something negative to get my attention.

GEMS help develop children's self esteem, and In less than 2 minutes you can help a child feel loved, valuable, listened to and important.

I am also linking up with Dumb Mom again this week....need a Mom tip...want to share a Mom tip Head on over to her place, she makes parenting fun!

My Little Miracles

Parties, Wildlife and the full moon, OH MY!

Meet Ben....it's his birthday! And we spent our Sunday at his awesome birthday party!

So Thomas and his best girl 'Rena had a ton of fun celebrating Ben's birthday

Meet Dudley, he is the resident turtle that lives in Ben's garden, and let me tell you, that turtle can RUN!!! No wonder the turtle beat the hair, those things can MOVE!

These Monarchs were given to Ben's sister for her birthday and they were raised from catapillars and we got to release them for Ben's birthday, they were so beautiful!

Look at the size of this sunflower....Thanks to Dudley keeping the bugs under control in this garden, this hugeness can grow!

And some of my besties, it's been a little while since we could all get together, but now that life has settled down for all of us we are planning to rectify all that! I have known these besties for over 20 dang years!!!! Mannn I am getting old. And as the party came to a close the moon was just as beautiful as ever....of course this pic does NOT do it justice!!
And that is how Sunday in my city looks this week.

Now head over to Unknown Mami's to see what she has going on in Her City!

My Little Miracles

Volunteer....it makes a difference

This past weekend, I know it took me just this long to post this, but I had an opportunity to attend and participate in a charity walk. It is for a place called the Friendship Circle, they provide support and opportunities to children with special needs. It was the most amazing thing. So many people came out, and so many of the children we are walking for participated and walked the 3 mile walk despite their disabilities. They were such troopers! And Thomas and I got "tattooed" in spirit of the walk!

It's amazing to see the outpouring of love when you attend these events and I can only imagine the love in the hearts of all the volunteers who make this place what it is! It's important for me to teach my children that volunteering and giving to others less fortunate is what's most important. I was amazed at how many young people were at this walk yesterday, and just how many of these young people donate their time to their summer and winter camps.

Not only do the donations matter but the volunteers who run them are imperative. Another organization that rely heavily on their volunteers is Guide Dogs of America. That one runs near and dear to not only my heart but my whole families. My mom is a puppy raiser….at least she was one until her HOA is attempting to prevent her from raising another puppy, that is a post in and of itself. I wanted to be a puppy raiser and found out that for one, I was pregnant with Thomas and pregnancy and a new puppy do not mix. Also my job would not allow me to do the duties I need to do in order to make sure my puppy would be successful, unfortunately! Remember this post? Yeah Tawney is one of those dogs, she unfortunately did not make it into the program, she would have made a great dog, but that harness just wasn't her thing.

Other organizations that are near and dear to my heart that thrive not only on their volunteers but their donations and participants are Being a Friend of Maddie, and the March of Dimes, due to the fact that I've had that NICU baby, Thank God he only was there for 5 days but it was scary for me. Cyndy is also walking for the March of Babies, check into her page as well! I also am a Proud Spirit jumper and if you haven't read anything about this organization, please check it out, YOU can make a difference.

The 2 day Avon breast cancer walk is going on in Santa Barbara this September, and I would LOVE to be able to participate in that, I think I am going to strive for that. I've had friends, and family alike who have suffered from this horrible evilness. And I want to be In it to end it! It's the donations and the people who make it all possible….someday we can hope for a cancer free world. I hope my children will know it! If you head over to Marla's you can read a really touching story about this very thing!

So just remember the next time you think about volunteering, and you think to yourself, "Oh they have plenty of people" You can NEVER have enough volunteers...and it does make a difference!

What are some of the charities near and dear to your heart?

My Little Miracles

I Believe....My Motto

Anyone who knows me, knows that I've lived a LOT of life in a short amount of time, (and if you stick around, you'll learn a lot of what I have lived) and there are many things I've learned....and some that I am still beating my head into a wall expecting a different result. But my motto these days.... LIFE HAPPENS, no matter what you are going through or your depression, frustration, happiness, sadness....life happens and with or without you, it will go on. So don't sweat the small stuff, live life as if it were your last day, tell those special ones in your life that you love them. Because Life is too short and as precious as it is...LIVE IT!!

And I know I have posted this before, but it's still a must read...

I believe -
...that just because two people argue, it doesn't mean they don't love each other. And just because they don't argue, it doesn't mean they do.

I believe -
...that we don't have to change friends if we understand that friends change.

I believe -
...that no matter how good a friend is, they're going to hurt you every once in a while and you must forgive them for that.

I believe -
....that true friendship continues to grow, even over the longest distance. Same goes for true love.

I believe -
....that you can do something in an instant that will give you heartache for life.

I believe -
...that it's taking me a long time to become the person I want to be.

I believe -
....that you should always leave loved ones with loving words. It may be the last time you see them.

I believe -
...that you can keep going long after you think you can't.

I believe -
....that we are responsible for what we do, no matter how we feel.

I believe -
....that either you control your attitude or it controls you.

I believe -
....That heroes are the people who do what has to be done when it needs to be done, regardless of the consequences.

I believe -
...that money is a lousy way of keeping score.

I believe -
....that my best friend and I can do anything or nothing and have the best time.

I believe -
....that sometimes the people you expect to kick you when you're down, will be the ones to help you get back up.

I believe -
....that sometimes when I'm angry I have the right to be angry, but that doesn't give me the right to be cruel.

I believe -
....that maturity has more to do with what types of experiences you've had and what you've learned from them and less to do with how many birthdays you've celebrated.

I believe -
....that it isn't always enough to be forgiven by others. Sometimes you have to learn to forgive yourself.

I believe -
....that no matter how bad your heart is broken the world doesn't stop for your grief.

I believe -
...that our background and circumstances may have influenced who we are, but we are responsible for who we become.

I believe -
....that you shouldn't be so eager to find out a secret. It could change your life forever.

I believe -
....two people can look at the exact same thing and see something totally different.

I believe -
....that your life can be changed in a matter of hours by people who don't even know you.

I believe -
....that even when you think you have no more to give, when a friend cries out to you - you will find the strength to help.

I believe -
....that credentials on the wall do not make you a decent human being.

I believe -
.... that the people you care about most in life are taken from you too soon.

So remember...Life Happens....LIVE IT!

Brought to you once again by the always awesome Mama Kat

My Little Miracles

Spring Love

When I was looking through my recent pics and trying to decide which one to put up I came across all these great shots from the flowers at the zoo....
And with spring in the air, the flowers were in full bloom....

And absolutely gorgeous, in a multitide of colors....

But I kept coming back to this one.....

This is what I saw on my shower door Monday morning when I was all groggy and not wanting to go to work....

Isn't the hubs great? I love my little notes of love he leaves me.....he thinks I don't realize them but I do, and it makes me love him all the more!!!

Now head on over to Angie's Big Top and see what else you can find!

My Little Miracles

Choices

Did you know....
*The average child spends only 12.5 minutes in communication with his/her parents
*On average a child receives 400 negative comments compared to only 32 positive
*The single most important determinant of Children's self esteem is the perception of how much they are valued by their parents

This week I am starting "Parent With Me" Different things I have and am learning about parenting. I'm not always right, as my kids will surely tell you if they had the words. I'm not always perfect, so these are things that work FOR ME....so Parent with me....tell me what works for you. Don't have kids? Doesn't matter, tell me what you think might work.

So let's talk about power and the toddler. Thomas thinks he has the power....his job is to misbehave. That's his job as a toddler and he is training his replacement, Christopher. So I have learned that his perception does not equal the truth. So if he feels he has the power his little tantrum stops. But the key is NOT to fight and definitely not to give in. It's the moment you take away his "power" that a tantrum continues.

I try to give my boys a choice....simple choices so that they are age appropriate. They have a choice of this or that. I am learning not to overpower them, that causes them to rebel and be destructive....that is NOT the way I want them to grow up.

I am learning that giving them a choice of "You can either do this, or be punished". Well what kind of a choice is that? I don't want them to be afraid of a choice. I want them to feel empowered by having a choice!

So right now my biggest issue with Thomas is changing his pajama shirt in the morning. He knows he needs to get a different shirt on, but he says no he wants to wear his pajama shirt. I have often thought of letting him go to school and telling everyone that it's his pajama shirt.....but then that is just letting him have his way and that is nothing but a downward spiral. I want him to learn to dress himself and pick out his own clothes, but they are going to be appropriate.

Otherwise we end up with Fashion By Thomas which looks something like this! Or even This.

Just because my boys pitch a fit does NOT mean they are going to get their way. I will not give in to that kind of behavior, it's not very becoming and it's inappropriate. So the other day I asked him if he wanted to pick the shirt he wanted to wear and you can almost see the wheels turning in his head. As if he was perking up to say "I can CHOSE what I want to wear?" He couldn't get to that drawer fast enough, so I picked out two shirts and asked him what he wanted, his dino shirt or his stripped green shirt. He sat and looked and looked and then he decided....the dino one is what he wanted to wear....and viola he didn't want his pajama shirt on anymore!

No tantrum, no over powering, no crying, no feelings of anger and resentment. It was a win-win for both of us. It doesn't always work because before my brain tells me that I need to give a choice not an order a tantrum is in full swing and he is no longer listening at which point he needs to go to his room until he can have his fill of his own tantrum.

So now it's your turn, tell me how you get out of some of your tantrums?

I am also linking up with Dumb Mom and Mom Tip Tuesday, have a tip to share link up!

My Little Miracles

You....belong in the zoo

Some of the familiar sights you may just see around town...

That is the actual size of a CA Condor....Thomas looks tiny!!!

Lions...


Tigers....
And Bears....

Oh yeah and cool dudes...

Do you think this zebra thought he was blending in?

This little guy was bummed he missed his chance on Meerkat Manor

All those animals makes for a sleepy Christopher

You can see all that and more at the friendly neighborhood
LA ZOO!

Brought to you this week by Unknown Mami

My Little Miracles

The clean plate club

So I'm ALMOST a member of the clean plate club! The hubs and I got Thomas' closet cleaned out and shelves put up so we can actually put toys and books in there instead of storing them in our family room. (Even if we still have a ton in there)

And then I managed to finally finish our taxes.

AND I finally got rid of 3 boxes and one baby bath full of old baby clothes. Phew! Donated them all to our church! Along with some bottles and shoes and socks and bibs! I hope someone gets more use out of them. They grow so fast, I can't tell you how many things were in those boxes with tags still on them! And of course I don't know a single soul having a boy right now! Well except Trudy, but dang she's half way across the world! =) And Trudy, if shipping weren't so much I would have sent you a ton of stuff too!

So now that all the clothes, well most of them anyways, have now been cleaned out, I can now work on the old toys, as well as the towels and wash cloths and blankets!

So while our garage is still packed full of stuff for our garage sale May 1st, at least I got half my plate empty so I can toddle off to the zoo with my boys this weekend and not have to think that there are a ton of things I should be doing beside enjoying my time with my boys! I'll only have 1/2 a ton of things and that won't weigh on my mind nearly as much!!!

Don't you just love Spring cleaning?

My Little Miracles

The bigger the better, the older the wiser?

I can imagine that the first time I ever wanted to be bigger....I can't imagine at that time I could associate being older with being bigger. But it was probably when my mom would put something up on top of a shelf that I couldn't reach. I watch Thomas and Christopher see things on the counter or up on the fridge and they want it and can't reach it. Thomas has always done pull ups (and if you haven't see that video, it's hilarious, the kid was 9 months old doing pull ups) so he will just pull himself up on the counter and attempt to get what he wants. Christopher just stands on his tippy toes.

I can remember our cat, in her "penthouse". She could jump onto the counter and then onto the fridge and then up on the cabinets.....Love those vaulted ceilings huh? And I can remember wanting to be bigger so I could get up there and pet her or be up there with her so I could have a birds eye view too! Look at her, up there....looking down at all us pee-ons...judging us....HMPH!

It's a cats life huh?

I don't remember wanting to be older until I was about 10. That is when I always wanted to go and do things with my brother and my mom would say that I wasn't old enough. Then I wanted to be older so I could go too! I have waited a long time to be this old!

You know, it's funny, you wait and wait and wait to be a teenager, so you hit 13 and nothing. You then have to wait to be 16 before you can drive....you drive and then what? You have to wait until you are 18 to vote or buy lotto tickets and you hit that enormous milestone and then you have to wait until you are 21 to drink...legally anyway....then what? What else do you have to look forward to? What? at 25 your car insurance goes down? (which is a myth anyway, it's only when you've been licensed for 9 years...so if you didn't get your license until you were 18 your insurance doesn't go down until you are 27) Okay...then what? then 30? and 40? So you have AARP to look forward to? Medicare?

So do I wish I could be older..nahhh...I want the knowledge, age is only a number anyway. If I knew then what I know now....the world would be my oyster! And the older I get the less I know. Funny how that works, when you are 18 you know EVERYTHING...and now? Yeah not so much!

Now?...Well now I just want to spend all my time with these precious gems...

My Almost Irish Twins....

Because no matter how old I am, Or how old they are, they will always be my babies!

Oh yeah and see that shirt I am wearing....isn't it A-DORABLE? My mom painted that....yes, free hand, she painted it! And I didn't get an ounce of that talent!

Another look into my life brought to you by Mama Kat.

Stay tuned for new and exciting post including the 1st episode of "Parent with Me" and some really important messages about the heart of volunteering!

My Little Miracles

Just because....

Because the sun never sets on the cool.....

And now that the sun is shinning a lot more these days....sunglasses are a must have!

Brought to you by Angie...see what's going on under the big top!

My Little Miracles

I've been Branded!

I was once told, never put anything on your body that is ever going to change, and make sure it is something you love. Like let's not put a frog on my arm and then hate frogs.

So I have 2 tattoos, my first....when I turned 24, my brother was killed 4 months prior, so for my 24th birthday I got a tattoo in his memory. A butterfly amist a crescent moon....his soul set free to fly, and it says In Loving Memory. And my love and memories for him have never changed. And I do not regret my decision for that tattoo.

My second, (and forgive the quality of pics....gotta love those cell phone images) And since it's still healing and looks a little less than appealing right now, we have yet to get updated pics.

So with no further delay...I give you....my 2nd branding....


Although you can't see all of the first part....these are the zodiac signs of what means the most to me in the world. All the way to the left and the largest....a Leo, for the hubs, 2nd is mine...a Virgo....third and a little smaller, Thomas', a Gemini and last but certainly not least, another Virgo for Christopher, all surrounded by a part of my heritage, Irish Shamrocks...because not only am I Irish, but I am the luckiest lass out there!!!

So not only will my family never stop being a family, but our zodiacs will never change and my love for my family will never falter! And I will not regret this decision either.

My Little Miracles