How about this yummy eyeball surprise?
Another eyeball yum?
Kitty Litter cake anyone?
Let's start with all the things that make me a less than perfect mom....
First, I always wanted to be a mommy, and I talked about all the things I would do as a mommy and all the things that I wouldn't do....I mean come on we all remember those times when were were kids sayin to our parents "I'll NEVER make my kid do that" and then we become parents and force our children to behave....the NERVE!
So when Thomas was born I breast fed him but only for 4 months *GASP* I know, I know. The kid was almost 10 lbs and I was starving him...so he was supplemented with formula. Trust me I tired everything I could and nothing increased the milk supply, and lactation consultants....yeah that is a post for another day.
So I felt guilty, and I cried for days on end. It didn't last long. Christopher came along and he wouldn't. nurse. AT. ALL. I didn't spend countless hours trying to force him to nurse, I didn't spend countless hours trying to pump, it was more frustration for both of us so he got breast milk in a bottle for about a month. The rest is history.
I also didn't and don't cloth diaper! OMG! I KNOW IT! But I do admire those that do!
And I'd like to think that I'm the best mom, that I never let my children NOT eat at the table, only have their drinks in the kitchen, they never watch TV while eating....but it doesn't always work out that way! I'm lazy sometimes and don't pay attention other times and I suffer from migraines and when one of those strikes the last thing I am going to attempt to do is fight with a screaming, crying, pouting, whining 1 & 2 year old.
I'm a huge sap....so I sometimes give in way to soon and way to quick....MnMs it is....just please stop crying!
I'd like to say I'm the most patient mom in the world that doesn't ever raise her voice at her children, but I can't say that. And it makes it even more fun when Thomas makes me laugh when I am trying to be a scary mommy and I can't help but crack right up. Let me give you a quick example...in our house right now the phrase of the year is DO NOT THROW....ANYTHING! So while eating dinner one night, Thomas wanted dessert and I said no, and he whined and I said again NO, you haven't eaten your dinner, and The Hubs piped in and said you make the chicken "all gone"....Thomas picked it up and threw it across the table and said ALL GONE! And looked at me for some MnMs....I think I almost fell out of my chair with laughter, instead of scolding him for what he did!
I would love to tell you that my children are always on their best behavior, never fight with each other or take toys from each other because I spend so much time with them that they love each other to infinity and beyond and they share so well. Umm yeah....not so much.
And I would love to say that it wasn't me who left a sleeping child in a car seat, IN THE CAR, while I ran into my mom's house to pick something up, only to have her say "where's the baby?" And I replied, "Umm, in the car, sleeping" As she about shoved me over to get out there. WHAT? I left the windows open and the car running!
One of my best moments...forgot to strap Thomas into the infant seat and proceeded to walk down the stairs with him, put him in the car, and drove to my mom's house before I realized it. I've even done it with Christopher as recently as last week. What? I'm a safe driver!
And it wasn't me who took my children in filthy shirts to the store, because I only needed a few things only to be stared down by several people like I just came out of my card board box to steal some bread!
Wouldn't you love for me to tell you that it wasn't me who turned up the radio in the car to drownd out the cries of my oldest child....welp....I can't. That too was me.
And last but not least, my child has eaten cake for dinner! Makes me start singing in my best Bill Cosby voice "Mom is great, give us the chocolate cake"
So I am not perfect, I strive to be like all my heros. I won't ever be the perfect mom....I am THAT mom, and like I just recently told a good friend, I do the best I can, sometimes it's enough and sometimes it's not, but that is the best part about a parent/child relationship, UNCONDITIONAL LOVE! What's the saying "Show me all your faults and I will love you in spite of them"!
P.S. I work OUTSIDE the home, I know how horrible I go to work every day and my two boys go to an in home day care!